Welcome back for post #2 of my mini-series “Dreams Die Before Coming True: May They Not Rest In Peace!” If you’re new here, you may want to know what you’ve missed. For a quick overview of my last blog post click here.
Below is 1 out of 5 MAJOR reasons for giving up on a dream. It may even be your reason for giving up on a small set of goals that will eventually lead to achieving your dream. These reasons are all created by your own inner-critic. The name I have given that inner self-critic is “The Brain Bully.” Do not let it bully you around and give it free reign over your mind anymore!
Overcoming reason number 1: (Realize the hard work necessary, get overwhelmed, and give up.)
When you realize the hard work necessary to achieve a dream, you start to feel overwhelmed. Your Brain Bully is saying things such as, “You don’t know enough to even think about working on that!” Or, “There’s too much you need to do to better your abilities before you’re even qualified.” The list could go on. And it does, always; until you tell your Brain Bully to stop bullying. Go ahead and try it…
“STOP BULLYING ME!!!”
Now that it has stopped bullying you, you can find out the worry or fear behind the message your bully was tormenting you with. Bullies have feelings that need to be made known although they may come across in a mean way. So, ask your bully what it’s good intentions are.
Perhaps your bully was just trying to let you know that you need more knowledge to help yourself be more successful in achieving your dream. If that was the case, make a list of smaller goals of what you CAN do now to be more qualified and to gain the knowledge necessary to accomplish those things. While working towards smaller goals, positive self-talk is a huge help as the Brain Bully tries sneaking back in… and it WILL until all it’s worries are addressed. Remember to look for it’s good intentions. If it says,
“This is never going to happen.” Counter it by saying,
“It will not happen overnight. It will take time.” If that bully comes back with,
“You don’t even have enough time to handle all your day-to-day tasks!” Come back at it with,
“I don’t have a lot of free time but I can set aside a little bit of time every week to work on this specific goal that will lead me to achieving my dream.” When that mind-meany keeps pestering you with,
“This is progressing way slower than you had imagined. You just must not be good at this.” Remember it’s trying to inform you of something. Perhaps that you need to re-adjust the way you imagined it? In that case you could respond with,
“It may take more than a year to achieve this dream but as long as I consistently work on my goals, I will see this dream become reality!”
Ultimately the Brain Bully tries to get you to believe that doing nothing to achieve your dreams is better than having to patiently put in the time and effort it takes to achieve such aspirations. What might it’s good intentions be in that case?
Maybe it’s just wanting to make sure you don’t over exert yourself. A more accurate message to support you in your endeavors would be much more helpful. Try countering it’s previous message with; “doing something small is better than doing nothing at all.”
It’s time to get started! What is something small you can work on today that can lead you closer to your dreams and goals? Remember, keep it small for now. You can do this!
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For a second opinion from a marriage and family therapist, here’s another really helpful article about ridding yourself from your inner-critic. Click here to view!
Until next time,
Be Gleefully Me (as you, not as me:-)
If you’re interested in being a part of my New Year’s Goals 2017 support group, view this video!!!